Post by shadow_scribe on Feb 6, 2008 19:38:11 GMT -6
I wrote this a few years ago, and even though I clearly remember me hating this story because it was written badly, I look at it now and I can't believe I wrote this. I hope you guys agree!
I played a simple chord on the piano, sighing heavily. I was back to the drawing board for my new song, yet, I had no idea where the drawing board was. Was this simple chord my answer? Apparently not, for nothing came into my head.
I looked down at the lyrics I had made, written in my notebook out of sheer imagination.
Half way through the night
Alone in bed
Lying awake to the sound of the stars
Twinkle like the crackling fires of red.
I played another chord to see where it got me. Still nothing. I banged my head against the piano, letting out a clashing off-key bang from the keyboard. I felt I had come to a dead end.
I get up from the sheets
And look out the window,
My hands cold from touch
The way I felt ripping our invisible bow.
It was a song about love, but it certainly did not seem like that. How to even start romantic was a task for a star to find within him or herself. I was no star. In fact, I was the dirt the star shone on.
Red hair that made you wish one was bald, freckles that even God could not count, zits that never seemed to leave me, and many other unattracting features dotted my face, my ugly body, my inability to live without names thrown at me like swords, gossip that didn’t burn like poison.
Since you had left me
Or was it I left you
I looked out that window every night
In search of you…
Why was nothing coming to me? Was it because I had left homework undone? Was it because I had not finished my chores yet? Was it because of my raw ignorance to try and ignore life itself? Whatever the reason, it was interfering with my special “talent” of writing songs. I stood up from the piano bench, the cushion inflating from my weight. The paper with my stubborn lyrics drifted to the floor. I wished not to see those words, but my eyes could not escape.
Chorus:
What if there were choices?
What if there was a second chance?
Would you take it?
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly
From up above to down below,
Unable to rest and sit
Oh with me by your side,
And how high we really could fly!
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly…
Five Years Later…
She grabbed me. She shook me violently, cursing at my every chance to breathe. She was me, unable to believe that my stupid love song had been copyrighted and still had no tune. I was upset of my results, after five stinkin’ years of trying to find a melody.
And now only I could figure out when to do such.
No one would accept my work. No one would appreciate the hard labor I had gone through, through gossip, bullying, harsh years of teenage life, being the bottom and still trying. No one had believed in me.
I twirled my red hair around my finger, staring at those haunting lyrics once again.
Can you accept my apologies?
My deepest darkest love?
I had meant no harm to you
But I had done much more than hurt our romantic cove
Along now the abandoned beach…
I sang a chord. Was that my beginning, my way out of the darkness? Five years had been spent on this song alone, five New Year’s resolutions, and more than a billion reasons to give up.
But I still tried.
The song, bones showing only, was my worst enemy. But I had worked on it for so long, and I could not give it up. It was like a depressing obsession, to prove that I was capable of doing great things.
I sang that chord again. It was no better than when I had first started, but I needed to find a way to get rid of those lyrics, have other people listen to it and not me, trying hopelessly to announce death sentence to those letters I stared at. I sang the chord, my throat vibrating.
“Halfway through the night…”
Chorus:
Oh what if there were choices?
What if there was a second chance?
Would you take it?
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly
From up above to down below
Unable to rest or sit
Oh with me by your side
And how high we really could fly!
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly…
Ten Years Later...
I look back on it all now. The teasing has left me crumpled on the floor, and even though my horrible love song is published, I can't take the critiques. I thought after all those years I could finally get something, a way out of the labyrinth that sucked my entire soul away from me for all of these years.
The door's wide open,
But I still believe that you're here.
You never left me, or did you go?
Is that why I still tear?
It's pouring outside. The strangers out there are all wearing raincoats and smiling. I slumped onto the ground, hopeless. That one song took away my will to live and be happy. I scared away friends, I shyed away from guys and I missed opportunities I'll never find again. What was wrong with me? It was just a song!
I look out from that door
And I find a feather.
I wonder...
Did you fly away from me?
Back to the drawing board I supposed long ago. But I never found that drawing board. Why has it left me voiceless and without talent?
Chorus:
What if there were choices?
What if there was a second chance?
Would you take it?
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly
From up above to down below,
Unable to rest and sit
Oh with me by your side,
And how high we really could fly!
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly…
I guess you finally flew.
You finally flew.
Finally flew.
Flew.
Away from me...
I played a simple chord on the piano, sighing heavily. I was back to the drawing board for my new song, yet, I had no idea where the drawing board was. Was this simple chord my answer? Apparently not, for nothing came into my head.
I looked down at the lyrics I had made, written in my notebook out of sheer imagination.
Half way through the night
Alone in bed
Lying awake to the sound of the stars
Twinkle like the crackling fires of red.
I played another chord to see where it got me. Still nothing. I banged my head against the piano, letting out a clashing off-key bang from the keyboard. I felt I had come to a dead end.
I get up from the sheets
And look out the window,
My hands cold from touch
The way I felt ripping our invisible bow.
It was a song about love, but it certainly did not seem like that. How to even start romantic was a task for a star to find within him or herself. I was no star. In fact, I was the dirt the star shone on.
Red hair that made you wish one was bald, freckles that even God could not count, zits that never seemed to leave me, and many other unattracting features dotted my face, my ugly body, my inability to live without names thrown at me like swords, gossip that didn’t burn like poison.
Since you had left me
Or was it I left you
I looked out that window every night
In search of you…
Why was nothing coming to me? Was it because I had left homework undone? Was it because I had not finished my chores yet? Was it because of my raw ignorance to try and ignore life itself? Whatever the reason, it was interfering with my special “talent” of writing songs. I stood up from the piano bench, the cushion inflating from my weight. The paper with my stubborn lyrics drifted to the floor. I wished not to see those words, but my eyes could not escape.
Chorus:
What if there were choices?
What if there was a second chance?
Would you take it?
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly
From up above to down below,
Unable to rest and sit
Oh with me by your side,
And how high we really could fly!
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly…
Five Years Later…
She grabbed me. She shook me violently, cursing at my every chance to breathe. She was me, unable to believe that my stupid love song had been copyrighted and still had no tune. I was upset of my results, after five stinkin’ years of trying to find a melody.
And now only I could figure out when to do such.
No one would accept my work. No one would appreciate the hard labor I had gone through, through gossip, bullying, harsh years of teenage life, being the bottom and still trying. No one had believed in me.
I twirled my red hair around my finger, staring at those haunting lyrics once again.
Can you accept my apologies?
My deepest darkest love?
I had meant no harm to you
But I had done much more than hurt our romantic cove
Along now the abandoned beach…
I sang a chord. Was that my beginning, my way out of the darkness? Five years had been spent on this song alone, five New Year’s resolutions, and more than a billion reasons to give up.
But I still tried.
The song, bones showing only, was my worst enemy. But I had worked on it for so long, and I could not give it up. It was like a depressing obsession, to prove that I was capable of doing great things.
I sang that chord again. It was no better than when I had first started, but I needed to find a way to get rid of those lyrics, have other people listen to it and not me, trying hopelessly to announce death sentence to those letters I stared at. I sang the chord, my throat vibrating.
“Halfway through the night…”
Chorus:
Oh what if there were choices?
What if there was a second chance?
Would you take it?
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly
From up above to down below
Unable to rest or sit
Oh with me by your side
And how high we really could fly!
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly…
Ten Years Later...
I look back on it all now. The teasing has left me crumpled on the floor, and even though my horrible love song is published, I can't take the critiques. I thought after all those years I could finally get something, a way out of the labyrinth that sucked my entire soul away from me for all of these years.
The door's wide open,
But I still believe that you're here.
You never left me, or did you go?
Is that why I still tear?
It's pouring outside. The strangers out there are all wearing raincoats and smiling. I slumped onto the ground, hopeless. That one song took away my will to live and be happy. I scared away friends, I shyed away from guys and I missed opportunities I'll never find again. What was wrong with me? It was just a song!
I look out from that door
And I find a feather.
I wonder...
Did you fly away from me?
Back to the drawing board I supposed long ago. But I never found that drawing board. Why has it left me voiceless and without talent?
Chorus:
What if there were choices?
What if there was a second chance?
Would you take it?
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly
From up above to down below,
Unable to rest and sit
Oh with me by your side,
And how high we really could fly!
Oh if only you could spread your wings and fly…
I guess you finally flew.
You finally flew.
Finally flew.
Flew.
Away from me...